Honestly...I feel worthless. as I think about it, I've failed at pretty much EVERYTHING I've worked for. Snowboarding's out. My filmmaking is only average, if not below. I can't make people see that I care. I can't connect with people. I'm not smart. I can't be creative. Maybe I DON'T care about people. Girls are out. I can't be a good enough guy...despite my desperate attempts. try to care about who they really are, respect them, cherish them. Nope. I can't let my family see what I'm going through, so that's failed too. I'm too selfish. I'm too good. I'm too bad. I can't be strong enough. I can't be confident enough. I'm not spiritual enough. I'm not noble enough.

I can't be enough.
I don't want to believe it....but it's all I can see now.
It hurts...I can't see the keys...they're too blurry....

I'm a wimp.

Running is cowardice. Hiding will never heal you.

It's time to move out and move up. No looking back...it's not worth it.

I am free, one thought at a time.

That's the truth.

Run away, run away

it starts to pull

he's in this place, in this place

to question who you are

Who am I?

Who am I?

I will fade.

 

Run. The word buzzes in my mind...promising relief from this weight. I can outrun it...I only have to try hard enough....run run run.

Run away, run away.