It's been a good week. But the unknown haunts me.

I'm confused, my mind is tangled, and I'm not sure what to think or how to feel. It's not quite like I expected. I'm determined to hang on, because feelings are so fickle. But I'm afraid...does she solely appreciate me as a friend? Just friends? Her friendship is so very important to me, but it's only the beginning, because I not only appreciate her, I ......love her. Yeah. I said it. I'm afraid if all she really needs is a good friend, that I'll be betraying that friendship by wanting something more. Has she only just enjoyed my friendship all this time? Have I been wrong? Maybe all she wants is a good friend...not...? But I don't know...maybe I'm not alone in my feelings. I just don't want to ruin our friendship. But our friendship without This would be a huge adjustment for me, not impossible, but really hard. It'd be a bitter cup to drink. She means so much to me. She can't possibly know how important she is. She's such a huge part of my life, I can't imagine it without her. I wouldn't want to. I'm determined to ride this to the end. Whatever comes of it, I'll never forgive myself if I let her go without trying.